Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Joyeux Noel - one for the books.

Joyeux Noel – Merry Christmas! As my friend Vanessa says, “one for the books.”

My first Christmas away from home and without freezing temperatures and snow fared pretty well.  Vanessa and I are together at the PCV house/workstation in Atakpame which is about 4 hours south of LT.  The house has all the coveted amenities: running water, refrigerator, toaster oven, shelves of old movies and books from past PCV’s.  Best of all – it’s just me and Ness here. So it was a quiet, mellow lazy day. 

I was planning to take the day off from running but after the call to prayer from the nearby mosque went on for an extra thirty minutes at 5 am this morning, I decided to go for a quick out and back around Atakpame.  In the States I usually try and run on Christmas morning; sneaking out after we open stockings and while my family is getting ready to go to my grandma’s house.  I smiled, stepping out into the dawn of a new day in Togo, thinking about how different this Christmas run will be.
As I stepped out onto the road, I thought about the change in scenery; flat, open, snow-covered Iowa fields traded in this Christmas for the rocky hills of this “city” in Togo.  Freezing temperatures and snow piles for humidity and palm trees.  Avoiding wandering goats instead of dangerous icy spots. Breathing in burning trash and diesel exhaust rather than cool, crisp, clean Iowa air.  Enjoying the contrast of elevation from Iowa as I manage my way up the steep hills of the Atakpame coast on the descent.    

Some things stay the same though, I thought to myself. I passed people freshly showered (good smells are a rare luxury here) and on their way to Christmas Mass.  People donned in puffy coats and stocking hats as they zipped by on their motorcycles–it’s cold here right now you know (77 ˚F to be exact).  And knowing I was going back to a hot cup of real coffee (thank you Rachel Kennedy) made me smile realizing we’re all not that different. Interesting too how the day seemed to go on like just another day. The song that talks about no snow down in Africa -with the chorus “Do they Know it’s Christmastime at all” popped into my head as truck drivers loaded up their semi’s, mama’s carried huge basins of water from the local pump to their homes on their heads, and as people stood outside their doors, cleaning their teeth with wooden sticks.  I guess, I thought to myself, things like this go on in the States too – people not recognizing the special day, but being in Togo has made incredibly more aware of the differences – and similarities, an aspect I really value in this experience.  

As if on cue, Togo brought me out of my dreamy like state and back into the real world as my host dad called me- not to wish me a Merry Christmas- but to ask again if I could buy him a computer when I’m in the States.  A running joke (sort of) with Togolese— we are always suppose to bring them things.  (For example: I told one guy I would bring him back a wife.)

Ness and I made pancakes for breakfast and it was just like home as she was itching to open the package my mom had sent and clearly labeled, “do not open before Christmas.”  We slowly pulled out the chocolate treats one by one.  We found "A Christmas Carol" among the stacks of DVD’s and we popped that in and enjoyed our mini candy bars-tastes of home. The night before we had made some Christmas crafts, watched "It’s a Wonderful Life" and enjoyed a pizza with real cheese (stores here carry Swiss!). 

We continued our craft making and planned our Christmas dinner. Ness made a traditional dish with plantains and meat.  I crafted my first pie crust and somehow our apple pie disappeared quickly (it was small).  A package of stuffing and a nice bottle of wine rounded out our Christmas dinner. It was simple and sweet.  Trying to go three-for-three with the holiday movies we popped in “Noel” which you’ve probably never heard of because it was that bad! 

A simple day, Ness and I talked about the simple things we have really come to appreciate over dinner. Our health, time with our families, the power of a shower were at the top of the list.   The discussion continued on what we’ve learned as far as ‘development’ goes and the similarities and contrasts of Togo.  As we marveled that 2011 is coming to a close I asked her what are the top three lessons she’s learned – or how she has grown this year.  The top of my list: learning how to really listen and the value in that, growing tolerance with a place that can be so backwards and with myself in changing and adapting with the  work here and my performance/success, awareness of myself -my body and health- and my surroundings, and my appreciativeness of the simple things.

A truly Joyeux Noel! Part of my story and one for the books…

Monday, December 19, 2011

A busy week of highs and lows.

They say this experience is one of extremes: days of high highs and days with low lows..this week proved such in some special moments and some indeed testing moments. 
Highs:
A productive day on Sunday (12-18-11): Church, laundry, enjoyed my homemade tomato soup, prepared and executed a basic lesson on nutrition for the group of women who meet on Sunday afternoons that went decently well. I explained that three meals of starches (rice for breakfast, yams for lunch, and pate – corn flour- for dinner—a normal day’s meals for most people) was not a healthy, balanced diet and that they should try incorporating at least one source of protein a day (eggs, tofu, meat, beans, fish – it all exists here, but some consider it expensive) and one fruit or vegetable. I attempted to lead a matching game where they drew cards with different items on them and they had to discern if it was a balanced meal or not. For example: drawing a tomato card and a yam card would be ‘good’ whereas a yam and a rice card were not ‘good.’ Simple concept obviously and I think they got it, but will any of them make any changes? At least now I can remind them when I see them around… they’ve been informed so now I’m on the lookout! 
I spent a few hours at my French tutor’s house that night translating a quick story I had written to French for Wednesday’s English Club. It was a pretty cool moment as one of his nephew’s (I’ve come to discover none of the kids are his, just living with him for the school year) who is about 12 and I sat there and translated into French. Not only could he read my scribbly handwriting but he understood the majority of the story! One of those sit back and smile, ‘this is PC’ moments.

Monday: two more nutrition discussions and English at the Middle school.

Tuesday: Biking to Sokode to retrieve the two packages from my sweet friends, Rachel and Legs (Katie). THANK YOU LADIES. I felt so special!  

Wednesday was another high point as I made my way to Blitta, a town off the main road about an hour south of LT.  Ryan and I were meeting PCVL Ben at his house to discuss Camp Espoir (the camp for kids affected or effected by HIV/AIDS).  Along with my other good friend Connor, the three of us will be assistants to Ben in planning and executing the 5 week event this summer. I caught a car heading south, filled with young college students heading back to Lome.  It’s always to be surrounded by educated young people, especially when they know Peace Corps and are respectful.  Coffee in hand, I smiled and had a ‘oh, this is a pretty cool experience’ moment. I text Vanessa that too—have to make the deposit in the ‘good stuff’ account for later in the week when I was cursing this pace!  The taxi motorcycle to Ben’s house was so nice too as the mornings here are cool and crisp and smelled and looked like fall. 

We then proceeded to have a very successful meeting discussing the planning and preparation stages for the next 5months including lots of idea sharing (Ryan is creative), explaining (Ben is the Espoir expert) and organizing (my list-crazy, OCD brain finally coming into use here!).  Color coded timelines, weekly objectives outlines and responsibility lists and I was a content girl!  The excitement and familiarity for planning and executing a big event (thank you YESS Duck Derby) overrode any anxiety about the amount of work ahead of us.

That afternoon I had my third English Club meeting and we read the story I had translated earlier in the week. Each kid was handed a new vocabulary word they had to listen for in the story, then write them on the board when they heard it.  This gave each of them a little responsibility and importance as we practiced definitions and pronunciations.

Friday and Saturday also fell into the ‘high’ category.  As Connor came up with a counterpart who wanted to learn to Batik with Aposto.  It was a relaxing day;  I made a few things and ate a whole plate full of fufu with my favorite sauce (peanut/tomato with cabbage and wagash- local fried cheese) that Nima made.  Melissa, a new PCV who lives south of me also came up to stay for the night.  While we were too full on fufu to make dinner, it made for a killer run Saturday morning.  We made delicious scrambled eggs and cinnamon/vanilla pancakes for breakfast and then they headed out and I packed up for my trip up to Bafilo. 

Lydia a fellow SED PCV lives about 90 min north of me in Bafilo and I hadn’t been there yet and I have lots of Velveeta to use (thank you mom and Karen Mason) so I headed up to have a Mexican themed dinner.  Bafilo is up in the mountainous part of the country and it was pretty walking around and meeting some of the people she works with.  Dinner was awesome as we made salsa, guacamole, beans, tortillas and cheese dip. 

If you’ll notice, I left out Thursday and Sunday from the ‘good’ list. Two days (which both had good endings) isn’t bad I guess.  Thursday’s debacle involved my window.  I was planning to spend the day videoing my host sister, Jamala for a ‘day-in-the-life-of-a-10-year-old’ but since the teachers are still striking in this part of the country there wasn’t any school.  It worked out as the night before my carpenter called and said my window was done (finally).  I was ready for him to come install it in my bedroom early Thursday morning. When he didn’t show up after two hours I called and he said he couldn’t find the mason (who would be the one actually putting a hole in my bedroom).  Fine, I said, I’ll find him. So I went straight to his house and asked if he was free. Seeing that he was I called the carpenter and let the two discuss. They said they would come ‘bientot’ (soon). I went home and waited some more.  Two more hours passed. Called the carpenter again and let my host mother talk to him this time.  He was busy at his shop and couldn’t find anyone to bring over the window. Okay, fine, I said, I’ll go get the window.  I make the 5 min walk across the road, pick up the window, keeping my frustrated thoughts to myself, thank him for his work , pass by the mason’s house, show him the window and say, ‘let’s go’.  By this time it’s 1pm and I’ve resigned to the fact that this will be a day-long process. Fortunately, the mason arrives quickly, and does a great job with the window.  I read the PC Lifeskills manual (for a girls club I’m hoping to start) and try not to think about the giant mess and hole he was creating in my bedroom.  After  few hours the work is finished and he cleaned up the mess; I was content.  The best part was when I asked him how much he smiled shyly and said, ‘no it’s a gift.’ I think he had picked up my frustration in dealing with the carpenter. No, I insisted, this is your job.  Grateful for his humbleness, good work and timeliness, I gave him a little extra and wished him a Merry Christmas. A long bike ride and lifting session as in store to finish out the afternoon and rid myself of any tension left from the morning!

Sunday, morning was wonderful as I enjoyed instant Starbucks coffee on Lydia’s roof, watching the sun come up over the surrounding hills, the afternoon took a nose dive as we headed to a small village close to Bafilo for an event that we were told was going to be about HIV/AIDS.  Starting two hours late (standard) the entire village had gathered (including about 20 important, toothless, illiterate and French-less, old men –the village chief’s) and it made for a perfect setting to discuss the reality of this pandemic, how to prevent it, explain treatment and living with infected.  Instead, the organizers spent the three hours skirting around the issue, stressing the importance of national identity cards, showing a variety of skits (in strange Togolese humor) and poems by the local ‘AIDS club’ kids- all in local language.  Finally when the director of the medical services spoke, he mentioned HIV/AIDS ONCE.  And that was the ‘HIV/AIDS’ portion of the event.  Lots of ‘prizes’ were handed out—have to give presents here, you know and then they wanted us to stay to have ‘refreshments’ with the chiefs afterwards. I was about ready to scream.  An hour later, holding back our super irritated and real thoughts on the event, we choked down the Coke they bought for everyone (great use of money) and finally got out of there.  I was able to collect my frustration on the moto ride back to Bafilo.  Sadly, I think this is how a lot of ‘events’ meant to educate happen in Togo.  The NGO that organized the event said that people won’t come if you tell them it’s going to be about HIV/AIDS (for many, they are just beginning to accept that it exists here) and you can’t talk about how to prevent it (condoms) with men and women present. Did I mention we were in an all Muslim village?  I knew these thoughts to be false from the events Aposto and the NGO in LT have conducted. They proudly display pictures showing condom demonstrations with huge groups of people and skits actually about the disease.

As I was leaving Lydia’s house in Bafilo, I closed my eyes, took a very deep breath and prayed God would ease my frustration, calm my upset stomach, and help me get back to LT (traveling on Sunday afternoons is risky as not many cars are running up and down the country) without too many travel headaches.  I felt lighter right away and made it home in a timely fashion.  Glad the day was over!

Now, this is my final week in LT until February.  I’ve got work to do for Espoir, lots of manual reading and lesson planning for when I return to village.  Hoping to spend tomorrow capturing Jamala’s day and visit a new PCV who  is close to me on Wednesday.  Thursday will be packing and preparing my house to leave and Friday I will head to Atakpame to join Vanessa for Christmas! 

While it doesn’t feel like the holidays here, I’m thinking about my friends and family lots as you prepare for the celebration this weekend. I wish you all a safe and very joyous holiday, praying you remember the reason we celebrate! 

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Lome....Encore


It’s Sunday again. I’ve got homemade tomato soup simmering on the stove and I’m recovering from Lome…again. It was an interesting week indeed:

Monday I began the morning by discussing the importance of using soap each time you wash your hands to my host mom’s groupement. I used charcoal to represent ‘germs’ and to demonstrate that only using water to wash (common standard here) after using the bathroom, leaves the germs on your hands. They nodded in understanding (I hope) as I poured water over the woman I designated to use soap as the charcoal clearly washed off. I tried to stress that the germs will enter your stomach when you eat if you don’t use soap and then you will get sick and that this lesson is particularly important for children. My mom helped translate from Koti-Koli to French and while I have my doubts that any of them actually went home and insisted everyone use soap, I feel better at least knowing the information.
Mid-morning I went to the school to visit my French tutor’s English classes. What I found was absent teachers and classrooms full of rowdy, bored kids. Thankfully Mr. Sinya was there and explained the nationwide teacher strike going on. “We want better conditions, so we are not working today or tomorrow,” he said. Sadly, they weren’t explaining it to the kids but were expecting them to sit in their classrooms. I stood there trying to decide if I should try something with no lesson planned and having no supplies. After about 30 minutes of trying to explain a spelling game with one 7th grade class, I gave up and tried to go home. The 8th grade class next door insisted I come and help them with their English. Not having any materials (the class and I), we tried having question and answer time and then I helped them a bit with some of their homework. A struggle though as I realized I’m not even close to being fluent enough in French to explain why English is the way it is. Frustrated and exhausted I hid at home the rest of the afternoon until it cooled off enough to go for a run.

Tuesday morning I went for a bike ride after a strong cup of coffee and finished it off with a lifting session (thank you Lorena for leaving the sand packed liter bottles). The PC car heading down country to Lome (known as the Lome Limo—no it’s not an actual limo, but a clean, air conditioned van—so in Togo and PCV standards- pretty close to a limo!) picked me up on the road (about a 5 min walk from my house) and off we went. While it’s nice to be with friends, have the AC, not be smashed in with smelly Togolese, the trip is still long (7 hours) and bumpy/uncomfortable. Arriving in Lome, I was quickly reminded how hot and humid it remains and I began to sweat instantly. I downed an amazing hamburger at the hotel I would be staying at for the week. It was just what I needed and I was off to bed. (Side note: this hotel –where most PCV’s stay when in Lome- is nasty and more like a hostel with a community toilet for the upstairs rooms, soggy beds with who-knows-what’s-on-them sheets, and dampness. I lay as still as possible, trying to avoid thinking about the bed too much or moving as it’s so hot. Gross. But, they have wireless , a decent restaurant, within our budget range, and it’s close to the PC office, so we keep going back.) 


We were up early Wednesday morning (unable to really sleep past 6 am anyway) to head to the PC office as I signed up to work the PC booth at the West African Trade Show, being held in Lome this year. We (my friends Abby and Emily) stopped for egg sandwiches and café au lait’s (more like sweetened condensed milk with a dash of coffee) at a little café on the way. The PC transported us across town to the Fair which ended up looking like a State Fair with 4 or 5 big warehouses filled with various artisans and companies from all over West Africa. Yes it’s the show for ALL of West Africa, but NO it’s not air conditioned and thus we were soaked in sweat by 9 am. Myself, a few other PCV’s and a few PC staff sat at the booth, explaining PC and its mission mainly to the large groups of elementary and middle school aged kids who were there on field trips. These were all private school and wow are there a lot in Lome! PC also invited some of the artisans PCV’s work with to sell their products and luckily Aposto arrived mid-morning and took over entertaining and leading the PC information with the kids. I grabbed fufu from the Fair as we headed back to the office.

Being in Lome is stressful: you want to “relax” and enjoy your friends, the freedom and the food the city offers. At the same time, there are usually a lot of PCV’s in town and thus there is work and meetings and business to discuss and things to get done. Meanwhile, it’s hot, humid, sandy (all but a few roads in Lome are sand), and takes a while to walk/get a car to the various places. To add to that, I was hoping to see my family and Michael via Skype as the PC office is the only place in country with a strong enough Internet signal. I was able to knock some things off my PC to-do list and then my friend Lucian and I headed out for gelato. Hailing a taxi, negotiating the price, and working our way across town was worth it as I slowly indulged in some black cherry creamy goodness. We walked to the beach (only a few blocks away) and enjoyed our sweet treat, talking about how quickly 6 months has passed and Lucians return home as he was leaving the following day. (Side note: the beach is not a beautiful, well-manicured place. Outside of the crashing waves that I love, there is garbage and people using the beach as their bathroom. We found a clean spot to rest and enjoy the water. Egg rolls for dinner from the Vietnamese restaurant not far from our hotel and Tylenol PM to fall asleep in the heat.


More of the same Thursday and Friday. Worked the Trade Show both mornings, but Thursday afternoon after some impromptu meetings for projects, my friend Kate and I headed to the pool. What a difference a little peace, quiet and lap swimming does for the soul. The sun was setting as we walked out of the fancy hotel and I was so relaxed I could barely remember which way we were going! It was so nice. The evening got even better as Skype worked and I got to see my parents in our home for the first time in 6 months. They looked great and mom showed me all around the house with the Christmas decorations and the SNOW outside! I was so excited. More egg rolls for dinner, but sleep aids weren’t necessary after the pool workout!

Friday morning I got up early to Skype with Michael which was wonderful but made for a very long day! I napped that afternoon after enjoying my first cold cereal and milk in 6 months (bought it in a shop near the office) and because I was alone in the office was able to get Skype to work again and got to see my Grandma , talk with the kids at my mom’s school, kids from Pleasant View in Webster City and my sister. The kids asked great questions and seeing my sissy made me very happy. Can’t wait to see you all in the flesh in just a few weeks!




Saturday morning was early as we loaded up the Lome Limo and headed up country for long, bumpy ride. Coming home back to LT is always welcomed – to be comfortable and clean and in my own house- but I still struggle with a bit of sadness/loneliness after being around so many friends. Luckily the people were excited to see me, shouting hello and welcome when I made my way to the weekly market. And what a difference in temperature! Wow, about 200 miles up country to LT and the air is lighter and cooler and I’m not sweating! Amazing! While I did wake up to a hazy covered sky (the dust is thick), I’m thankful for the lack of humidity and being able to function comfortably and dry again!

Big week ahead with meetings for Camp Espoir beginning, organizing the MAC surveys, batiking some Christmas gifts with Aposto, leading some small nutrition lessons with my women’s groups and the usual English classes at the Middle School.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

And I considered nursing school..

11/30/11
Have some water with your ants.
Everywhere you turn they are there.  An no I'm not just a bad housekeeper.  As we near dry season they are searching for water and they are pretty talented at finding it.  Leave a few drops in your pot from the morning's coffee- they will be there. You cant see them or where they're coming but they appear- EVERYWHERE. I've taped my any slight opening in my water filter, topped my pots with heavy rocks on top of the lids, I've sprayed lots of toxic chemicals (outside) but still nothing works.  Give them credit for their tenacity -but c'mon! Tonight they made into the pot of soup I made at lunch..and I'm too tired to  sift them out or make something else. They blend in nicely with the spices...gross, but I boiled it -and what's a little extra protein right?


I've had some pretty cool experiences this week and it's only Wednesday.  Monday and Tuesday morning I spent at the middle school which sits about a stones throw behind my house.  My French tutor, Mr. Sinya, teaches the equivalent of 7th and 8th grade English.  Each class has at least 100 students - the majority being boys as many girls have already dropped out or gotten pregnant.  I counted about 20 girls from each class. I was impressed with their comprehension and ability to read the text that they must photo copy from the teacher (of which most of them haven't).  Excited to have a native speaker, Sinya kind of let me take over the class as they stood and read the text while I corrected their pronunciation along the way.  Making a list of words they struggle with, we practiced saying them aloud before the period ended.  While I really enjoy teaching, it's exhausting keeping 100+  kids ranging from 12-18 years old quiet long enough for someone to read aloud.  When I realized the majority of the boys (who are also older) did not have the text and were the noisiest, I called on one and made him come to the front to read. The look on his face told me he might not be able to read and I had a moment of panic.  But, he could read just fine and it set an example to the rest of the class who behaved much better after that.  Seeing the girls become fewer and fewer as they got to the the higher class level, made me really want to connect and encourage them.  The only trouble is finding a time to meet/gather them.  School is already a stretch as girls are the ones who work around the house. If a girl is still in school by 7th or 8th grade it means her parents don't force her to stay home and work, the family has the money to send her, and she hasn't gotten pregnant.  Tough chicks.  I'm hoping for a way to reach them.


MAC (malaria/mosquito net survey) this week took me to a late morning meeting Monday where a Muslim woman Lorena introduced me to summon ten of her neighbors so we could complete the malaria/bed net check survey.  Her leadership and the way they listen to her is pretty incredible.  The women just came out of the woodwork.  None of them spoke French, so there I was surrounded by a dozen or so Muslim women- old and young, babies and wide-eyed, dirty, half naked little kids and the leader calling out questions in local language and then turning to me to translate into French. Pretty cool and another of those "Peace Corps" moments.


Tuesday afternoon's MAC activities led me to the other side of town to survey the Christians with a woman who is the president of her groupement and whom I met at church.  These woman leaders- who speak French- are essential to connecting with the rest of the people.  We walked to 19 different houses that afternoon; asking each home if they had mosquito nets and if they used them.  I saw some of the poorest homes (mud huts with thatched roofs) as we were literally out in the bush.  Houses and areas of town I never knew existed. What's more- as the daily break in the day was finishing, kids came out of the woodwork, dressed in their khaki uniforms, headed back to school.  Walking to and from twice a day, some of these kids probably cover several miles.  Most households we met with were headed by women or and older group of women.  Still amazes me how welcoming and friendly they are and open to my questioning.  Again, my guide translated the questions and I was surprised at how many homes had nets.  Surrounded by prairie grass (or something like it?) and 10 ft tall sorghum I smiled and reminded myself that -'oh ya, I'm in Africa!'


Wednesday afternoon is English club as there is no school in the afternoons (as many families need their kids to work in the fields).  Totally making up lesson plans on my own, today's activities included lots of directions (numbering off, forming teams) which these kids have never heard before --in French, let alone in English.  Sinya was there to help and I have to say it was pretty cool to watch them figure it out.  They are smart and creative, just need the chance to show it.  We reviewed 'if you're happy and you know it' and now they can sing it on their own.  Then we talked about animals and I had them pair up with one person writing the word and one drawing it. This alone took several minutes: 1. I used paper from last week-and they insisted that everyone find their paper they wrote on, 2.explaining that yes, I want you to draw the animal and 3. numbering off and finding their partners.  I just sat back, smiled and thought, 'they are going to get good at this by the end of the year!'  We formed teams and played a form of charades-- a new concept too.  They are quite competitive and while I'm not sure how much English was learned I was pleased to watch them laugh and smile and work as a team to guess the animal. A very rewarding afternoon indeed.


12/4/11
Thursday I headed to Sokode as I was out of vegetables and it was my first free day to get away.  The power has been out in LT (and throughout the country) for the past few days, but thankfully it was back in Sokode so I organized my malaria/mosquito net findings at the PCV workstation.


Friday I entered a whole new world.  Was biking from my house to the hospital for the weekly baby weighing when I came upon a mama I recognized with twins.  I left my bike at Aposto's (about halfway in between) and walked with her, taking one of the babies.  We got quite the looks on the road as I carried one in my arms and she had one on her back; the people thought it was so funny and joked that the little boy was mine.  Sadly, my arms ached when we arrived at the hospital; babies are heavier than you think! We arrived to a hallway filled with mamas and their babies.  For the first time, I had the courage to sit down next to one who was there because her 4-year-old son was refusing to eat. I asked the mama how many other kids she had (4 others) and if this one (her youngest) would be the last one. She responded, that it's up to her husband. I smile and insist that 5 is a lot and that she can decide too; it's your body right-- I say. She just smiles shyly.  When she meets with the nurse I insist that she and her family wash their hands with soap and water before they eat (the little boy most likely has a parasite from sticking his dirty hands in his mouth).


I spot a teacher from the middle school and discover his daughter was just born last night. When I go to see the mother and baby I recognize the girl who I know to be only 21 and hope and pray that she wasn't his student who has now dropped out. (Sadly, this is very common here; teachers sleeping with their female students).  I so badly want to be happy for her and them, the young mother seems happy, but part of me is so sad for the struggle that awaits them. Lea, the nurse practitioner (and the main one managing the circus) bounces to give a young boy a shot and I tag along holding down his legs as he squirms. Mama's and babies wait in the hall and Lea goes to pull the vaccination charts of the ones who have arrived today.  I've caught onto her system now after watching a few times and I insist that she go attend to the others who are ready and I will organize and search for the remaining files.  She looks at me with relief and runs off to continue the weighing.  Finally, I think, I'm able to be useful! When she returns we talk about how young the girls are who have given birth this week; 20, 21 I say? She looks at me and smiles and replies 'yes, but also as young as 12 and 13.' She asks if its like that where I'm from. I say not usually and she is surprised that I don't have any children. ' When,' she asks. Not until after I'm married and have a good job I respond.  She smiles and says, 'that's good, it's not like that here though.'  I tell her my mom taught me that a long time ago, to which she responds, 'she's smart.' Ah, the simple things you take for granted in America.


And then, as I'm already satisfied with how the morning is going, I step into the hall where the nurse is talking to the mothers about family planning (I'm praying it reached and sunk in with at least one of them), a very pregnant mama walks in who looks like she's about ready to pass out.... or give birth.  Lea rushes the woman into one of two exam rooms and gets on a table (laying on the cloth she brought herself).  Lea washes up and I help her get her apron and shoulder length gloves on. Holy cow, I say to myself, this is really happening.


Freaking out inside, I try to control my energy as I realize I'm about to witness my first birth.  I put gloves on (I don't know what to expect!) and try not to make too many faces of pain and discomfort as I watch the mama push while Lea tugs on the head.  Lea laughs as I gasp at the first sign of the head.  She shuffles between pushing on the mom's uterus and working the head out.  I stand there frozen in shock and awe. The baby girl comes out and the cord is around her neck. Lea moves quickly to put her on the mom's stomach and instructs me to  grab the one tray of utensils which holds three pairs of scissors.  She sucks the mucus out of her nose and mouth, clamps the cord and at last the little girl cries.  Lea smiles, places the baby in the same utensil tray (now empty), cover's her with a cloth and attends to the mother.  I'm still frozen but trying to shake it off and make sure the newborn doesn't slide off the table.  I break off a tiny bottle of something for Lea and she loads it into a syringe to give the mother.  As she finishes cleaning her up, I feel nauseous and run out of the room.  Nothing came of it, but I shake my head wondering how I ever even considered nursing school.  I hold the little girl who is now swaddled in more cloth that the mother brought and we walk mother (who is only 20 by the way) and baby (her second) across the hall to the room where patients rest.  I come out with the baby and the hallway erupts in applause. I hope they're not clapping for me; Lea deserves the praise. I sit down exhausted, Lea runs off to continue weighing and vaccinating. She looks at me and smiles, "this is how it is here," she says.


Still not feeling well Friday afternoon, I rested Saturday at home taking the day for myself reading and relaxing.  This morning I went to church and after being alone all day Saturday, I realized another reason why I love church so much as it's because I feel so loved and a part of their family.  The second candle of the Advent 'wreath' was lit and the priest asked us how we were preparing our hearts for Christmas.  That was the gist of what I caught (my French is coming along slooowly), but it was good as I've sort of forgotten it's the Christmas season.  Vanessa and  I were talking about how it's funny that it really doesn't feel like the holidays; no one's out buying gifts, the weather isn't changing (except the wonderful winds of Harmattan), life is going on as normal in our villages.  I've had very sweet packages filled with decorations for my home and my little tree is up; my friends and I will do our best to celebrate together in a few weeks.