Little Moments

Since I last wrote I’ve had a handful of special little moments.  Little things from each day that I’m grateful for as there has also been a lot of downtime and something I’m struggling with a bit lately. 

Little moments like this morning when the choir broke out with a couple new songs that had the most beautiful harmony I’ve ever heard from a choir. Strong, bold, beautiful.  The Catholic church I attend here celebrated the confirmation of about a dozen people.  The church was packed and I had to share half a seat with my nurse friend from the Hospital.  I tried to not let the moment be ruined by the swarms of children at my feet in the packed, three hour service.

Little moments like yesterday at the weekly market when Aposto and I hung my mosquito in an empty stall and talked to the crowd about sleeping under their mosquito net.  Yes, this sounds like an easy concept, but when it’s too hot, people sleep outside and leave their net inside.  Our point was that you can hang your net outside too as I demonstrated by laying on a mat under the net. We made signs in the two local languages and in French.  Some people asked questions, some people gave their testimonies of how their net had kept them healthy, and lots of people wanted to buy a net.  The other cool moment was walking to a little store in town with my little friend Wren and her brother Abadu Baba.  Wren is 7 or so and we joke that she is my Togolese daughter. These two live in the same compound as Aposto and I as I was waiting to go to the market I asked Wren if she wanted to walk to the store with me. Abadu, who likes me on some days and other days just screams when I appear, decided he wanted to join us and so it was quite the site to so many people from out of town who don’t know me.  It felt like they were my kids as we held hands and sang Abadu’s favorite song and I bought them a treat on the way back.

Friday the little moment was in the hour I got spend helping weigh and give the Polio vaccination drops to the dozen or so new babies who were there for their ‘check-up.’  I’m so thankful for such a capable nurse at our hospital.  She is smart, confident and speaks very clear French – and she trusts me and gives me stuff to do!  Later, I checked my email and had some very sweet messages from a couple of mentors back home.  One reminding me that, “not many people would give up two years of their life to help kids half a world away have a better life,” and “your work is never easy, but always important.” So encouraging, so uplifting. Thank you to those special people!

Thursday the moment was at the last girls club of the year as I taught the girls some American relay games (wow, they’re competitive!) and then enjoyed some candy from America as we talked about what we had learned throughout the club.  Returning home, exhausted from the heat of the day, I had some quiet time with the new baby (still not sure of his name) as the evening cooled down and then sat with him and my host mom as she gave him his nightly bath.

Wednesday morning the moment came when I was at the monthly meeting with Lama-Tessi’s local health agents.  One of the more capable group I’ve met with, I really felt like these were my people; my team. I told them about my goal of spending time with each of them when they have their meetings in their neighborhoods and do their home visits.  Not only as a way to keep them accountable to their action plans, encourage them in their efforts, but also to support the discussing of Family Planning at their various events.

Another cool moment came as I watched my English Club kids head home with armloads of books for the summer.  Being the last session for the year, I wanted them to be able to use the books that we have throughout the summer, so they each checked out (all on their own!) a handful.  It hit me that while it doesn’t seem like much, it’s pretty neat that these 15 kids have something from the generosity of my hometown and what’s more, something to read this summer. I was watching and thinking this as we were walking back to my house (they love to carry my things and walk me the 2 minutes to my house) and I let them come in and look around for the first time. (Something in the culture here; people don’t go into people’s houses much, everything is done/discussed outside).  They were funny; staring at new things in wonder: rice in a box? A giant ball that you can’t kick or throw but you use to ‘work out’ with? And trying to identify me in the many pictures I have decorating the walls.  It was funny; they make me smile.

Tuesday I attended the other local health agent meetings in the small villages north and south of LT.  The village to the south where we met in the morning has a really nice hospital. Why, I asked, is there electricity, a real table for women to give birth on, a full pharmacy (things the LT facility lacks)? Why? Because the hospital was built and is funded by a world Muslim association; not the Togolese government. Learning/understanding more things all the time.

Tuesday’s moment came in the afternoon when we were visiting the village to the south, Yao Kope.  Set back in the woods, there is a beautiful rehabilitation center for people coming out of prison, run by nuns.  That sounds scary/not exactly a friendly place to hang out, put the center was virtually empty and Nima and I wandered around the large summer camp like facilities.  They have real trades like chicken and pig raising, and two giant gardens with and one dark room growing mushrooms for the people to learn and use to readjust back to civilan life.  To appreciate this beauty, you have to know its rarity in Togo. First, the rehabilitation aspect in itself is pretty unusual here. Second, the place was so incredibly peaceful; no churches or mosques ringing at all hours, no hoards of animals or children running around, no loud trucks and cars zooming by. Third, real programs, real trades- properly raising animals instead of letting them wander wherever- and large, organized gardens are really really impressive. I was so happy; so excited to have discovered this place!

So there were special moments sprinkled throughout my week.  I realize this may sound ‘cool’ and it is and I have to remind myself of it- just hard sometimes when that moment is 20-60 minutes and leaves you trying to fill the rest of the day! Reminding myself this is Africa, you’re in the Peace Corps Taylor.  No, this isn’t a 9-5 desk job.  No, no two days are alike and no there is no predictability. This is what you wanted. Yes, I know I sound like a broken record; believe me I’m just as frustrated with constantly telling myself this as you probably are reading if for the tenth time.  Perhaps this will be/is my biggest vice; the battle I fight throughout my service.  “Never easy; always important…”

We Have Arrived!

This may be the end.  For my blog posts complaining about the terrible heat that is.  After a sweltering day Thursday – the first night I slept on my cot in a wet cloth – a big storm rolled in the wee hours of the morning and the rain poured for hours.  I awoke to put out my buckets and when I woke up Friday morning, it was chilly- yes-that’s the right word- and I had fresh, cold water! And we’ve had five- count them- FIVE- days of rain and cloudy, cooler weather. Amazing how much easier life is when you’re not constantly sweating!

Unfortunately, Friday morning I also woke up with a nasty cold.  This wouldn’t be a big deal because I had nothing going on and could rest at home all day, except that my house was a ruckus because…. I have a new baby brother!  Yes, my host mother gave birth Thursday morning to a baby boy.  I made it there about 20 minutes after she delivered and got to swaddle the little guy and show him off to all the neighbor ladies waiting in the hall, who went wild.  I sat with my mom and urged her to drink and eat as she acted like it was nothing and soon was carrying on with the ladies about the latest market prices.  After two hours, she paid the hospital fees (about $6) and we found moto-taxi’s and she took the baby and went home. Amazing.  Then our house was packed with excited Muslim women and their arm loads of half-naked, noisy, dirty little rascals.  So I spent a lot of time with my Ipod Friday.  I couldn’t complain too much either because my gas finally ran out and my family kept me stocked with hot water for tea all day as they had a pot over the fire to bathe the baby. 

Thursday was also exciting as the follow-up session of self confidence with my girls club went really well.  I concentrated and prayed all week on taking the pressure off myself- just focusing on being with the girls and seeing my role and time with them as a positive part of their week—not a life saving/changing couple of hours that had to be perfect in order to be effective.  I did this without knowing it for myself my English club and it’s amazing how much more joy and satisfaction that was bringing me! The few girls who had really gotten it the week before helped me re-explain it and we did some easy activities of giving each other compliments and drawing pictures of ourselves with positive phrases about what they can do and what they love about themselves.   

After a yucky day Friday I had a great weekend with Melissa in Sotoboua the larger town about 20 miles south.  I really like Sotoboua; less of the city feel of Sokode but with nice amenities (nicer post office, a couple cafes, a library/community center and a PARK –with benches and lots of trees and everything!). The PCV’s before us have established a deal with the radio station and every Saturday afternoon there is a 30 minute American music radio show called “Tune in Togo.”  Melissa chose 7 songs about rain and we dedicated the time to discussing rain and its impact in here versus in the States.  All in English, to music we know and love.. it was so much fun.  It’s our way of “bringing America” to Togo- ha!  Of course it’s likely only PCV’s with that radio station understand anything we say –but still it’s a cool cross culture activity.  And, I think I may have found my new calling…. J

Sunday morning we helped at the monthly Club Espoir.  An offshoot of Camp Espoir this summer, the organizations who work with HIV/AIDS impacted kids year round, hold monthly mini-camps throughout Togo.  Fun was mixed with learning as we sang and danced for the first half and talked about malaria in the second.  Finally, we made popcorn to show the kids a way to earn some extra money during the vacation time.  For lunch we went to the café that makes fufu with great peanut sauce and fried chees, and enjoyed the park afterwards- such a nice ‘en ville’ day!

In addition to enjoying the nightly storms that cooled everything down (literally squealing in delight), we made some delicious treats (brownies and pineapple upside down cake) in Melissa’s dutch oven, and watched some movies.  Not exactly chicken noodle soup, but still a great cure for my cold!

Still Hot

I just shredded a chicken.  I’ve watched mom do this a few times after she would buy a ‘wonder chicken’ from the grocery store. Oh what I would do for a bowl of her chicken and noodles right now.  Rice and cabbage will have to do. Labor Day (May 1) is a big celebration here. In my more pessimistic moods I made a general and slightly cruel but true statement about the event, “they save what little money they have from what little work they have just to party for one day; to buy new outfits and meat.”  They literally work to live. And maybe there’s something to be said for that, but sometimes it’s frustrating- especially when they go for weeks without protein and filling meals only to stuff themselves with carbs and meat for one full day.  It’s a cultural thing I realize and I’ve got to accept and respect their way.  

Aposto and the gang from the NGO and the local micro finance ‘feted’ together on Sunday as they wanted to save their party for the weekend instead of during the week.  They eagerly invited me to join and I paid in for the meal and new pagna.  (I guess I can’t comment on the tradition when I want to take part!) When we realized I had to go to Atakpame (3 hours south) last weekend for a quarterly MAC (malaria action committee) and couldn’t be there for the celebration, Nima and Aposto volunteered to save the meat I paid for and continue the party with me when I returned. So, last night the three of us made a giant meal of fufu and tomatoe sauce with LOTS of chicken. Oh I was so full.  Aposto insisted we enjoy a cold drink at the bar after and then Nima left me with ‘my chicken.’  Knowing my lack of cooking enthusiasm/knowledge she me clear instructions of how to store the roasted bird overnight and insisted that I must cook it this morning.  So that’s what I did.  I’ve never felt more like an animal (well, this place has brought out a lot of animalistic characteristics but still) than when I was tearing into that scrawny chicken this morning; my excitement when I got to a decent size piece of meat! Protein for a week I thought!

 Anyway, the weekend in Atakpame was nice.  After another frustrating girls club Thursday evening (explaining self-confidence proved more difficult than I originally thought-easily the most frustrating session yet- but I’ll spare you the details) I headed south Friday morning.  The trip was smooth and the highlight was definitely seeing and being with Vanessa for the first time since February. That girl is so awesome- my total opposite and I think we complement each other so well.  With another PC committee in town along with the group of us MAC leaders (2 PCV’s per region) it was a full house- literally. PC has a house where volunteers can stay (8 beds) and work with a computer, a kitchen and living space and lots of books.  So, Ness and I retreated to the quiet little hotel run by nuns at the edge of town.  I took advantage of the beautiful mountainous scenery in Atakpame and went running each morning.  Saturday and Sunday were filled with MAC work; defining our goals, brainstorming ways to motivate and inspire other PCV’s to do malaria related work in their villages.  It’s tough- creating a program from nothing and trying to get others on board.  Add in the difficulty of doing work here in general, and the natural communication frustrations and you’ve got quite the challenge.  I’m enjoying being a member and not leader on this one J.

Saturday was rough for me.  I realized what day it was mid-morning sitting in the MAC meeting; YESS Duck Derby day.  An exciting day I had been anticipating; even received a sweet ‘duck filled’ package from the YESS crew who had included me in the pre-event excitement.  The Duck Derby-the event that had been a giant part of my life the past two years in Des Moines, was happening.  I knew the day was coming and had been generally very excited for it, but at that moment the sadness and missing the rush of the day just ran me over. Add to that, my mom graduated with her masters Friday night from my school – UNI- and it killed me to see pictures of my family at the ceremony on the campus and in CF where I have so many memories.  So proud of you mama. Finally, one of my dear friends, Sky, got married on Saturday in sunny Texas.  These three combined for a deep longing for home.  Thankfully, Michael listened as I whined from the pity pool later that afternoon and Ness and my other friends were very understanding and comforting.  Don’t get me wrong- I know I’m meant to be here in Togo.  I know that if I was home (having never left) I wouldn’t be happy with myself.  But, there are moments when home is all I want.  Again, fighting the grass-is-always-greener mentality.  Later over a avocado and banana smoothie (the PC house has a blender- and there’s a store in Atakpame with REAL MILK) I thought and talked over the excitement of this PC adventure; the good work I’m doing here and the opportunity I’ve taken advantage of and will one day look back on with irreplaceable memories.

Then God reminded me He was there. I had returned from a nice run Monday morning as it was cooler and the sky was overcast, protecting me from the early morning sun.  I was stretching at the hotel, watching the sky rapidly change as the clouds moved over the mountains and a new song by Britt Nicole came on my Ipod.

“You never said the road would be easy, but You said that you would never leave.  You never promised that this life wasn’t hard, but You promised You’d take care of me. So I’ll stop searching for the answer, I’ll stop praying for an escape and I’ll trust you God with where I am and believe that you will have your way. Just have your way.”

As the cool winds surrounded me and the words filled my head and heart, I was so comforted in God’s presence and peace.  Something I try to focus on and seek daily, I’ve realized it’s much easier to hear God’s voice and see His blessings when you’re in solitude in village.  After struggling to find it with being surrounded by lots of others the past few days, this was a welcomed and wonderful moment and I walked through yesterday with a renewed spirit.

It’s still scary hot here; the locals say the rain will start this month. The PCV’s (who are more specific and realistic) say it won’t be until June that rain and cooler temps will arrive.  On attend. We wait.  In the meantime I’m trying to figure out a way to make a kiddie pool out of a plastic tub, (not really but that would be great if the water supply wasn’t so low) covering myself in mentholated powder and praying the electricity/my fan works.